Welcome to FIHL Jeopardy!

Timberwolves GM Dan Levesque

Ratz Book is the Other New Release

New Book on Ratz

Bonny River, NB - After urging by many people, the Bonny River Ratz have released a book that will allow people to understand the mystique behind the franchise. Co-author Joe Stevens noted, "For years many people have come and gone and it takes a special type of individual to be one of the Ratz. Ask Matty Walsh, Shane Smith, or Joe Walsh what it means to be a Ratz player and they will say immediately - very special. We have been very careful who we have recruited and if we feel you're suitable, you're gone. Everybody knows that coming in; you can be gone as fast as you got here. By the way, you don't have to be an idiot to read this book, but it helps."

This book will teach you the basics and you can build on them and hone your skills to be a true Ratz player. Some things included are the "take no shit look," and the "what's this asshole talking about" look. There are illustrations of Stevens and other Ratz players demonstrating the proper eyebrow and facial contortions to make these and other moves possible so you can pratcice in the mirror.

The book reminds the reader again and again that "you are not on the Ratz because you're like this, you're like this because you're on the Ratz."

Former Ratz star Shane Smith has a special chapter where he outlines his experiences with the club. Smith relates how the team bonds together when the going gets tough or the when the cops are buzzing around. Smith obviously misses the comraderie of the Ratz and often harkens back to the days when he sported the red, white and blue of the Ratz.

Two New Books Hit Shelves Today

Matty Walsh's New Book a Big Hit!

Blacks Harbour, NB - Let's say you're in a meeting and you suddenly doze off or zone out and somebody asks you a question. Then you respond, "Oh yeah, like I was saying, it's always coffee time. Let's take a little breather here." Chances are you have read Chapter 1 in Matty Walsh's new book Bullshitting for Dummies. It tells you how to wiggle out life's little emergencies like this one and a whole lot more. Don't have the $39.99 to buy it? Well, the next step here is to grab a coffee and say, "My memory is going. Now what was that question again? Maybe you could simplify it or put it in layman's terms so we can all understand it? Hahahahhaha!"

Available where all fantastic and awesome books are sold.

Chamberlain Joins in KIngfishers Kid's Day Celebration

Fish Bowl Could Be Awarded Tonight

Goalies in the Spotlight

L.D. Ganong in Action (Top) Andrew Dugas (Bottom)

XXX Tender Nick L. D. Ganong Chillaxing
Timberwolves Andrew Dugas Chillaxing

Blacks Harbour, NB - The St. George XXX are facing elimination tonight and Kingfishers GM Matthew Walsh says "The Fish Bowl will be in the House, know what I'm saying?" The Kingfishers have had the trophy since its inception and will be sad to see it go.

Coming off a 6-5 overtime win Monday night thanks to Randy Hanley's marker, the Timberwolves are poised to take the trophy and run. Most experts feel that it entirely possible a game 3 will be needed but it really comes to goaltending. Both teams have proven tenders with the XXX having FIHL Top Goalie Nick Ganong between the irons.

Former Ratz standout and now Timberwolves door slammer Andrew Dugas need not take a back seat to anybody in this league. Dugas credits a lot of the success this team has enjoyed thus far to GM Dan Levesque. Dugas said, "We haven't won anything yet and the boys have to understand that. Dan has assembled an awesome team and win or lose, he's the guy who deserves the most kudos. I am wearing my dancing shoes tonight just in case."

Sometimes Words are Hard to Come By

Cunningham Reports: "Ratz are on the Market for Sale"

Mike Gould Meets the Press on Tuesday

Cunningham in Charlotte Co. Tuxedo on the Red Carpet at Golden Partridge Awards

Pennfield, NB – Hockey Voice insider Geoff Cunningham’s name has come up as part of a giant consortium of Pennfield people that is rumoured to be kicking the tires of the Bonny River Ratz. Cunningham, along with Mike Gould, and another person not yet named, has expressed interest according to reports. Although Cunningham seemed to be elusive as to whether the reports are true or not, his tone seemed to suggest they are true.

Cunningham, when reached on Tuesday, offered, “If I was to invest in the Ratz organization, and I say if, there would have to be some major changes put in place. I would bring in another prolific scorer like Taylor to give the team some offense and a reputable bench boss as well. Taylor has been carrying this team for too long and it’s time to give him some help. The team seems to struggle putting the puck in the net in the post season when the games mean something. There will be lots of changes if we were to purchase the Ratz. We are sending scouts to the BIG SHOW this weekend to get a clearer picture of the talent that is there. ”

Kingfishers "Kids Day" a Big Hit

Matty Walsh, Scooby Doo and Unidentified Child

Blacks Harbour, NB - Now that the Kingfishers have been knocked out of the FIHL playoffs, team GM Matty Walsh thought it would be a good idea to give back to the community. Walsh and the team hosted a Kids Day at Fundy Arena with plenty of treats and games to go around. Walsh said, "It was good to see all the kids and it was big hit. We got to sign a few numchucks and the kids had fun bobbing for French Fries. When we cracked a couple kegs, the parents seem to leave for some reason."

Some Members of XXX Shy About the Finals

Chippy Chiller Would Rather Hide than Play it Seems

XXX Take Aim at Timberwolves

Jason McGrattan, LD Ganong and Scott Matheson Share a Laugh on Monday

Moffitt Trims Up New Ride

Andrew Moffitt with Tin Foil Rims

St. Stephen, NB - It may not make Pimp my Ride, but that doesn't bother Andrew Moffitt. His new bike with tin foil rims is just the latest of his creations. Moffitt said, "I used to put hockey cards on the spokes. Now I have progressed to this. I can fix anybody up if they are interested in dressing up their rides."

Vintage Photo of Bagley Surfaces

Josh Bagley in Pretty Shorts

Blacks Harbour, NB - Josh Bagley was a bronze medal winner in the 1993 Charlotte County Tug of War Championship held in Honeydale. Bagley said, "This was one of my proudest moments. I really gave it my all, 110 % if you will."

Joe Walsh Ties the Knot

Hockey Voice Entertainment Critic Joe Walsh and Family

Toronto, Ontario, Canada - Joe Walsh has tied the knot and says he couldn't be happier. He noted, "There would have to be two of me to be happier right now boys. Me and Edith are really glad to get this over with. I want to thank everybody at the Hockey Voice for the keg of beer, beef jerky and condoms. The last one may have been a little late but I know everybody means well and that's what counts in my books. I look forward to coming back home to party with everybody. Get the monster trucks tuned up 'cause old Joe's coming home pretty soon and the stomping boots are going on! Turn down the suck and turn up the good."

Bagley Enters Charlotte County's Next Supermodel Contest

A Very Shy Josh Bagley

St. George, NB - Josh Bagley says he's been thinking about doing modeling for a long time and now that hockey season is winding down, he will have the time to devote to it. Bagley said, "I was a little shy about it, but when I heard about Charlotte County's Next Supermodel, I was all over it, man. I was Mr. Piskehagen 2008 so I know I have the stuff. Now where it goes from here, is anybody's guess. I am being sponsored by the Hockey Voice, Fat Bastard Wine and Horse Piss Beer and I want to throw a big shout out to them."

Kingfishers "Reload" not "Rebuild"

Matty Walsh on Fundraising Trail Already

Blacks Harbour, NB - It's not even 24 hours since his team exited the playoffs and Matty Walsh is on the attack for next year. Walsh said, "I have some firewood to sell if anybody is interested. I'm not using the Hockey Voice to peddle my stuff. Just give me a call if you need any and yes, I deliver. We need the money to attract some new players for next season. You can't start too early in my books."

Dugas Sends Back Post Card to MacDonald and McGrattan

Blacks Harbour, NB - Balcks Harbour Timberwolves goalie Andrew Dugas said, "I really miss MacDonald and McGrattan too and wish they were here. I want them to know that this where I'm vacationing and they are very welcome to stop by any time. In fact, they will be by next week. Increase the peace."

McGrattan and MacDonald Send Hockey Voice Post Card

St. George, NB - XXX players Ryan MacDonald and Jason McGrattan are vacationing and wanted everybody to know they miss us all and wanted to say a big "hi." McGrattan said, "We are staying in a place called Hooker. They are all really nice people and I'll tell ya, they really know how to take it in their head to make some money."

FIHL Welcomes 2009 Checker Champ

Leo Devine 2009 World Checker Champ

Blacks Harbour, NB - Leo Devine, 2009 World Checker Champ visited Fundy Arena Tuesday night. Matty Walsh, who organized the event, said, "This guy is a world champ. It's not everyday you get somebody like this in your area. I had my checkerboard signed and he gave me a signed T-shirt that says, BULLSHIT, YOU TOOK YOUR FINGER OFF IT! Good stuff."

Timberwolves Advance to League Finals

Kingfishers' Run at the Top is Over

Matty Walsh Salutes Timberwolves

Blacks Harbour, NB - The Blacks Harbour Timberwolves advanced to the FIHL finals by virtue of a 5-2 victory Tuesday night over reigning champs Fundy Kingfishers. Talk of Kingfishers hiring lucky leprechauns did little to deter the Timberwolves from their goal. The Timberwolves will now face the St. George XXX in what should be a dandy of a series. Kingfishers GM Matty Walsh hoisted a cold one to salute the victors and wished them nothing but the best the rest of the way.

Walsh said, "The league has been getting tighter and tighter every year and it is really difficult to prevail. We are happy with our season, but didn't get the result we were looking for. Like Shakespeare said, You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need."

Stevens Dismisses Conditioning as a Factor in Ratz Loss

Joe Stevens after Sunday's Loss

Bonny River, NB - Joe Stevens says the Ratz are in the best shape of any team in the FIHL. He noted, "If Cunny or anybody else wants to talk about the Ratz losing, leave conditioning out of it. I have seen guys doing curls with big cans of beer so I know they are serious about their hockey. No, it may have been a lot of things, but not conditioning, boys."