You might be from Charlotte County if............................
The entertainment at your wedding was a boom box.
You broke a toe when your belt buckle hit it.
You’ve muted your TV before farting.
You’ve had to move a baby seat to make love.
You bought dinner at a pet shop.
Your cheques feature pictures of dogs fighting.
Your pen pal is a guy you “did weekends with.”
You’re banned from all your son’s sporting events.
Making your bed disturbs at least three animals.
The dentist tells you both your teeth have cavities.
You’ve missed more than a week’s work with heartburn.
You whistle at women at a funeral.
You’ve switched over to beer to sober up a bit.
You’ve put a sign “No more toking” inside your house.
You answered your cellphone at a wedding.
Going for a drive involves “catching ‘er in gear.”
You have no idea how many pets you have.
Your snowshoes are actually tennis rackets.
You’ve ever sang at a pet’s funeral.
If “playing caps” is mentioned in your obituary.
If you’ve ever put .22 shells in a woodstove to liven things up at a camp.
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