Weatherby Putting Deals Together

Weatherby: "Ratz Have Me Worried"

Ryan Weatherby Works the Phones Late Friday

Blackland, NB - With game 2 over 2 days away, Twisters GM Ryan Weatherby still feels the pressure to make sure he will come after the Bonny River Ratz with a full squad. The Hockey Voice reached Weatherby on Friday and he said that despite the big W on Tuesday, he wasn't going to be overconfident. He noted, "Well, we let Taylor get on the board and we can't be doing that every night and expect to win. I'm just putting some deals together right now that hopefully we see us have all our guys Sunday night. The Ratz have me worried for sure."

XXX Fans Flock to Get Good Seats for Playoffs

McGrattan: "I'm Looking After my Buddies"

Jason McGrattan's Happy Friend After Getting Box Seats for Playoffs

St. George, NB - The playoff round for the St. George XXX is a ways off, but that didn't stop team GM Jason McGrattan from meeting fans on Friday. McGrattan was on hand as part of a team promotion where all playoff ticket buyers got a free toothbrush and a box of chocolates. McGrattan said, "This is all about the fans, man. I am so pumped for the playoffs to be finally here. We had an excellent turn out today and I got to meet a lot of them."

Walsh Predicts a Ratz Victory

Walsh Speaks of Ratz Pride

Matty Walsh Meets with Press Early Friday

Blacks Harbour, NB - Matty Walsh allowed the Hockey Voice to get a glimpse of his morning routine on Friday. Walsh covered many topics including game 2 between the Ratz and Twisters. Walsh said, "I have played against and for the Ratz and those guys have a tremendous amount of pride. I cannot see them bowing out Sunday night. That's just my opinion. You can go talk to Crazy Cunny, but just be aware that he didn't get that name for no reason at all."

Sweeney Pumped for Game 2

NBCC GM Keeping a Stiff Upper LipJustin Sweeney Prepares for Game 2 March 8

St. Andrews, NB - Justin Sweeney is as colourful guy as you would ever meet, but even his latest get up is a little over the top. The heavily tattooed dude cancelled his press conference on Friday as he had a wine glass in his lip and could not be understood. It is not known why or how it happened. Team officials were not returning calls to the Hockey Voice on Friday.

Blackier Having a Good Time on Vacation

Blackier Misses FIHL

Chris "Doobie" Blackier on Vacation

Lepreau, NB - The Pirates are set to start the 2008-2009 FIHL playoffs but unfortunately, Chris Blackier will be out of the lineup. He is on vacation in undisclosed location according to team officials. However, the Hockey Voice was able to reach Blackier. He noted, "I miss the FIHL for sure. I'm just sitting back having a few. Also, I found a new spot to put my drink."

Mr. FIHL for March Gives out Fashion Tip

Twisters Star Jordan Morrow Named FIHL 2008-2009 Player of the Year

Morrow Cops Hockey Voice AwardJordan Morrow on Right Parties After Announcement

Blackland, NB - Jordan Morrow was named the Hockey Voice Player of the Year winner in a recent poll. Morrow, who toils for the expansion Blackland Twisters, knocked off 13 other nominees. Morrow wins the chain saw rifle, a Bonny River Hunting License and a Bonny River Driver's License. Morrow met with reporters and noted, "I'm pretty excited about the award. I want to thank all the fans who voted for me. I'm pretty pumped about the chain saw rifle too. I will have to check to see if the Bonny River stuff will fly up my way or not. I can't see why not."

Crazy Cunny Not Crazy About Ratz

Cunningham Sounds off on Stevens and RatzHockey Insider Geoff Cunningham

Bonny River , NB - Hockey Insider Geoff Cunningham called out the Ratz after the 8-2 pounding they suffered on Tuesday night. Cunningham said, "Geez, I've seen more jump from a drunk porcupine. It was a good thing I had free box seats or I'd be asking for my dough back. They have Taylor out there blocking shots and trying to carry the team? The poor guy's back must be sore from carrying those guys. One bright spot was that very pretty goalmouth scrambly goal he knocked in with the loose tape on the end of his stick. Pretty. I read where he's the third highest goal-getter in the playoffs. You know that's gonna change once the rest of them get going. Stevens had better bring it next game or once again, the Ratz make an early playoff exit. If that happens, you KNOW I'm gonna have lots more to say."

Bagley Heads Up New Band

Bags and the Hags Opening for Neil YoungBack - Chris Hoffman, Matty Walsh and Jamie Harris

Front - Joshua Bagley

Blacks Harbour, NB - It's a long ways from being a director of officiating in the FIHL to fronting a band opening for Neil Young. That's what Joshua Bagley is facing. Bagley sat down with the Hockey Voice and said, "Hey man, this is what I've always wanted to do. Apparently, Neil heard about us through our friend Chad Chambers who always runs with the big dogs. Chad told Neil and his peeps that we have a wicked sound. Anybody who has never heard of Bags and the Hags should give Piskehagen Princess some rotation."

Walsh Squeals on Cunningham

Cunningham Going to Crow Bar Hotel?

Geoff Cunningham in picture with giant moose

Blacks Harbour, NB - It seems the smell of government money was too much for Matty Walsh. Walsh claims he validated the date of a picture of fellow Hockey Voice employee Geoff Cunningham with a moose and it was taken last Saturday afternoon on MacDougall Lake. Walsh noted, "After all, I am the director of all things photography and you'd think I'd know this stuff. I called Crime Stoppers and I'm getting a reward. Ching, frigging, ching!"

Cunningham was spotted early Thursday morning in Pennfield and offered, "I never heard anything about a moose being shot boys. You say Walsh told you? Yeah, he's the same guy who stole a chocolate bar at the drug store and called Crime Stoppers on himself and collected a $2,000 reward. Surely you're not believing him? Having said that, was there really some moose in MacDougall?"

A Paid Announcement by Ryan MacDonald

Ryan MacDonald Shows off his new shirt

FIHL Guy Shows How AE Hat Evolved

Stevens: "We have told Murray to stay away for awhile"

Ratz Send Murray PackingRatz Star Defenseman Kevin Murray

Bonny River, NB - Right on the heels of allegations that two Ratz are the subject of an internal investigation, the Ratz have sent Kevin Murray home. Murray was in the line up for the 8-2 shellacking at the hands of the Twisters Tuesday night, but Stevens says he will not be playing Sunday night or Tuesday for that matter. Stevens said, "I have spoken to Kevin. He knows what is expected of him and he accepted that. I think that after the long season, he may have to recharge his batteries a bit."

Ratz Investigates "St. Stephen Boys"

Stevens: "We are suspicious but we are not cutting them at this point"

Andrew Moffitt, Chris Richardson and suspicious individual

Bonny River, NB -On the heels of a resounding defeat Tuesday night, a story has broken out about Ratz players Andrew Moffitt and Chris Richardson. The story goes that they are hanging out with suspicious people off the ice and it has drawn the attention of club captain Joe Stevens. Stevens said, "We have warned them about this and how it could affect their future with the team. One night this little guy is in the dressing room and their picture appears in the Hockey Voice the next day. Last Tuesday Richardson comes to the the rink with this bigger guy wailing on his Blackberry and guzzling beer. It just looks funny to me. Any time one of your players walks in with a guy called the Candy Man, you have to ask yourself, what is going on here? We have no plans to cut them at this point, but they know our position on this type of behaviour."

Need we say more?

Bad Pool Player

Words of Wisdom and Inspiration

And you thought your job was bad?

Yeah! More Motivation Baby!

As If We Needed it......More Motivation

Motivational Poster of the Year

Bonny River, NB - Many hockey experts including Twisters GM Ryan Weatherby noted the Hockey Voice motivational poster that depicts a vertically challenged male stripper as probably the picture of the season. Weatherby said, "That one is a classic and has to be added."

Kingfishers GM Matty Walsh added, "That will put the Hockey Voice into the Big Leagues if it isn't already. Ya just have to post that one for all the fans to see."

Blackland Twists the Ratz in Series Opener

Lethargic Ratz Fall 8-2

Kingfishers Squeak Past NBCC in Shootout

Blacks Harbour, NB - Although it is not clear if Ratz hibernate or not, it is abundantly clear that they at least get sleepy. After a scoreless and careful first period, the Twisters got second period markers from Mike England, Robbie Lambert and Steve Penny to grab a 3-0 lead. Penny added a pair in the third and Lambert scored another and Hockey Voice Player of the year 2008-2009 award winner Jordan Morrow and George Estey rounded the attack. Bill Taylor was solid in net, making saves when called upon. Mark Taylor and Greg Justason managed to penetrate the twines for the Ratz. It was clear who wanted the win the most and the Ratz now face a first round elimination like they have had in the past two FIHL seasons. The teams tangle in Game 2 at 7:40 on Sunday in Blacks Harbour.

The Fundy Kingfishers trailed most of the game Tuesday night but managed to tie the game with under a minute remaining. The 5 minute overtime settled nothing and despite hitting two posts in the shootout, the Whalers fell 7-6 to the Fundy Kingfishers.

FIHL Releases Motivational Posters Just in Time for Playoffs

Kingfishers Not Outdone by Stevens Workout Ritual

Hoffman and Walsh Wearing New Sauna Pants

Blacks Harbour, NB - Chris Hoffman and Matty Walsh said they weren't about to let Joe Stevens grab the spotlight with his big workout ritual thatw as reported in the Hockey Voice recently.

Walsh noted, "People were saying that Hoffman had a nice rack and stuff and we knew we had to do something. These pants are unbelievable really. We have slimmed right down and everybody had better look out in the playoffs. Farting is not all that easy but it makes a nice sound."

Stevens: "We Hope to Have all Hands on Deck"

Stevens in Best Shape He's Ever Been InRatz Captain Joe Stevens

Bonny River, NB - The Ratz have had an up and down season but captain Joe Stevens feels the playoffs will be a different story. Stevens noted, "I am in the best shape I've ever been in. From my meetings and conversations with VP of Player Development Mark Taylor, we should have all hands on deck when the puck drops Tuesday night at at 9:10. We have 3 solid lines of forward and D and plan on using everybody. Warren Giesbrecht is pumped and ready to go. This is not a team that has any fear of any team and for good reason. Here's what we have got planned and it may be subject to change.

The tentative forward lines are;

Joe Stevens-Jim Buchanan-Mark Taylor

Andrew Moffitt-Jason McFarlane-Greg Crusty Justason

Eric Truman-Mark Johnson-Kyle Leslie

The D combinations are scheduled to be;

Chris Richardson & Carl Chambers

Shawn Monaghan & Kevin Murray

Shane Watson & Jack MacNeill

Kingfishers Headquarters Abuzz about Playoffs

Walsh Holds Meeting at Team HeadquartersMatty Walsh Outside Headquarters

Blacks Harbour, NB - The Fundy Kingfishers realize there are 6 teams after them and the Fish Bowl and they are "concerned" according to Matty Walsh. Walsh met with team officials briefly on Sunday. Walsh said, "Right now we are focused on the NBCC Whalers and nothing else. This squad has been steadily improving all year and we ain't taking them lightly."

The Kingfishers host the Whalers Tuesday night at 7:40 in Game 1 of their best of three first round series.

Harris and Groom Selling Tickets on New Ride

Kingfishers Hold Huge Money Raising VentureJamie Harris and Greg Groom

Blacks Harbour, NB - Jamie Harris and Greg Groom have been working on a vintage Ford that they feel will yield some "serious coinola." Groom said, "Me and Harris have checked her all over. It looks and sounds pretty good. Slap 3 or 4 tires on 'er and you got yourself a nice reliable automobile. If we can't sell $10,000 worth of tickets on this baby, I'll eat my shirt that is around here somewhere."

Tickets go on sale Saturday at Kingfishers Headquarters for $100 each.

Cunningham and Mahar Team Up in New Comedy

Fart Wars Coming to Theaters SoonJeremy Mahar and Geoff Cunningham in New Comedy

Pennfield, NB - Right on the heels of the dismal showing of Funny Cunny II, comedian Geoff Cunningham is hoping his new flick with Jeremy Mahar will yield better results. Cunningham said, "Jeremy is a hoot to work with. We really clicked on the set. I can't say a lot about the show, but beans and wieners will definitely play a big part in it. We're both really excited about it."

Richardson "Excited" About FIHL Award

Ratz Star Takes Home Most Sportsmanlike AwardChris Richardson and His Bitches

Bonny River, NB - Chris Richardson was named the most sportsmanlike player in the FIHL in a poll conducted by Hockey Voice stats man Matty Walsh. Richardson said, "Hey, this is great. Picked as a winner by your peers is the ultimate prize. I now want the big prize, the Fish Bowl."

The Hockey Voice Most Valuable Player award voting is still open on this blog.

Here are the remainder of the awards as selected by the FIHL Team Representatives.

Top Goaltender
Nick Ganong (XXX)

Top Forward
Scott Matheson (XXX)

Top Defensemen
Tom Van Wagner (Twisters)

Most Sportsmanlike
Chris Richardson (Ratz)

Most improved
Keaton McKay (Lepreau)

Executive of the Year
Mark Taylor (Ratz)

Ken Linseman or the Roughest Sandpaper Award
Tom Wilcox (XXX)

Organization of the Year
Fundy Kingfishers

Taylor: "I Told Cunny to Take a Couple Days Off"

Cunningham Told to Stay HomeCunningham Focuses on Jr. Silver Kings (Front & Center)

Bonny River, NB - The Hockey Voice Editor Mark Taylor said he told troubled staff member Geoff Cunningham to "take a couple days off." Taylor added, "I had a talk with Cunny and we decided it would be best if he stayed away from the boys for awhile and come back with clear head and he agreed."

Cunningham has been involved with the Blacks Harbour Jr. Silver Kings as GM but has expressed an interest in returning to the Hockey Voice. He noted, "I looked in the crystal ball last night and there's all kinds of things to talk about. I just want to get back with the Voice and continue to do what I do best."

Joe Walsh Meets Bert & Ernie

Walsh: My Life is Complete!Ernie, Bert and Joe Walsh

Hollywood, CA - Joe Walsh, the entertainment critic for the Hockey Voice recently rubbed elbows with two of his all-time heroes. Walsh noted, "Are you kidding me? Bert and Ernie are great guys. I always liked their acting. Just to meet somebody like that is really something and you know, it's all because of this job with the Hockey Voice."

McGrattan in Booze Stealing Scheme

McGrattan Caught in the Act

Jason "Ninja" McGrattan

St. George, NB - The phone rang off the hook at XXX Headquarters until acting GM Scott Matheson picked it up on Wednesday afternoon. A very angry Matheson said, "I don't know anything about Juggy stealing booze. Who the hell is Ninja anyway? What's wrong with you people?"

Sweeney and Weatherby Team Up to cut Travel Costs

Twisters Extend Helping Hand to NBCC TeamRyan Weatherby Picks up NBCC Hockey Gear

Blackland, NB - Ryan Weatherby says he doesn't mind lending a helping hand to fellow league members NBCC Whalers. Weatherby said, "I'm driving right by and it's just a little ways off the trail and I don't mind. I have a full load now so I hope nobody else needs a lift."

NBCC GM Justin Sweeney said, "This is one of the great things about this league, everybody working toward a common goal."

Clark Named Mr. March 2009

Matt Clark is FIHL Mr. March

Lepreau Pirates GM Matt Clark

Ratz Throw in Another Prize for FIHL MVP

2008-2009 League MVP to get Chain Saw Gun

Ratz Captain Joe Stevens with Chain Saw Gun

Bonny River, NB - How many times have you been out sawing up wood only to see a deer standing nearby or out hunting and see a nice jag of firewood? Well, now you will be ready no matter what. That is, if you are the 2008-2009 Hockey Voice FIHL MVP winner. The Bonny River Ratz have donated the new contraption and captain Joe Stevens said, "Anybody who doesn't get excited about this, had better get their pulse checked."

FIHL to Honour its Best in 2008-2009

Walsh Announces FIHL Awards ProgramHockey Voice Stats Man Matty Walsh

Bonny River, NB - Matty Walsh met with reporters briefly Monday to discuss the upcoming individual player awards in the FIHL. Walsh noted, "Although there is not an actual award, we thought it would be great publicity to give the recognition to the players in the Hockey Voice and in the Saint Croix Courier. I sent out an e-mail today to all teams to supply me with their team's choices. The categories were best forward, best defenseman, best goalie, most sportsmanlike, most improved, and best executive (on and off ice performance). In addition to these, I asked for 2 names of players deemed as most valuable to their respective team that will be put in a Hockey Voice poll question to decide the Hockey Voice's MVP for 2008-2009. The Voice has graciously donated both a Bonny River Hunting License and a Bonny River Driver's License for the winner of this award. There may be some other awards to be dished out as the finishing touches are being put on them as we speak. Stay tuned."

Walsh Goes Down in Fight with MacQuarrie

Walsh Takes on Heavyweight and Loses

Mike MacQuarrie Delivers Blow to Matty Walsh

Las Vegas, NV - Number one ranked Mike Mac Quarrie showed why no punks from the lower weight classes should step in the ring with him. He pummelled Matty Walsh Sunday in the first round of a scheduled 15 round bout in Las Vegas. After the fight, MacQuarrie said, "I knew I would need to have a cigarette and didn't want to spend all night chasing him around the ring so I put him away early. Hey, can somebody get me a Pepsi?"

Stevens Lays it on the Line

Joe Stevens at Ratz Headquarters Saturday

XXX Puzzled by McGrattan's Erratic Behaviour

McGrattan Raising Some Eyebrows at XXX Headquarters

Jason McGrattan Takes a Break Before Game

St. George, NB - XXX officials are remaining mum on the situation but Jason McGrattan's behaviour has them puzzled. McGrattan showed up at the last game with a new hairdo that contravenes team policy. It is not known whether the team can actually penalize or fine the star forward.

The Hockey Voice continues to push for some comment but at press time, none was available.

Cunnigham: Bring Me Back or I'm Gone!

Cunningham Being Recruited by National TV Geoff Cunningham on the Left

Toronto, Ontario - Geoff Cunningham has issued an ultimatum to the Hockey Voice and it has the little publication in a frenzy. Cunningham said, "I don't have to listen to Taylor, Richardson or Walsh. They can take the job and put it where the sun don't shine. Frankly, I have an offer on the table right now that would make their empty heads spin. I can go big time if I want to. They have 24 hours to marinate on this little morsel."

Where has Hoffman Been? The Voice Knows

Hoffman Trying out for Chinese Weightlifting TeamChris Hoffman Celebrates

Blacks Harbour, NB - Kingfishers management has been tight-lipped about the status of Chris Hoffman and the Hockey Voice obtained information on Sunday that settled it. The team has granted him a leave of absence to pursue his Olympic dream. Hoffman, know as Hoo Flung Dung in China, has been training hard in hopes of cracking the squad.

No comment was offered by Dung or the Kingfishers and it is not known if Dung will be back in the line up this season.