Joe Walsh Hi! My name is Joe Walsh, the entertainment critic for the Hockey Voice. I have been out of the loop for awhile and just recently was given what most people would characterize as a “plum” assignment. I guess living in Toronto has its advantages but it certainly doesn’t help when a fella’s trying to get into the journalism racket. Once the FIHL season ended, I had a feeling I would be getting something but certainly didn’t think I’d get the Mark Taylor interview. I’ve known Mark Taylor for many, many years and must admit I’m one of the biggest fans, if not THE biggest fan of his in Toronto. I recently got the chance to sit down with the icon and here's an excerpt of the things we discussed.
JW: I know the fans out there want to know what happened to the Ratz this year. What can you tell them?
Taylor: Well, Joe, I must say yellow is definitely your colour. I guess there’s a lot of blame to go around and I’ll start with myself. Being shut down in the playoffs is never a good feeling but I was double-teamed and sometimes triple-teamed and the boys couldn’t get the puck to me and I wasn’t able to get in there and pounce on rebounds like you’ve seen me do so many times. Our best players weren’t our best players, I’ll just say that and leave it at that.
JW: I read somewhere where you said that all people who wear sunglasses are stoned. Do you still feel that way?
Taylor: That is a bit of a misunderstanding right there. I think that people who wear sunglasses in stores buying chips, chocolate bars, Cheech & Chong movies and Visine could possibly be stoned. I think that when people walk around inside malls and stuff with the really dark ones, all wrapped around their eyes, it’s a good possibility they are crying or are really all fucked up. Just go over and start talking shit to them, and you’ll find out really quick.
JW: I also read where you like to talk to people and find out their story. Somebody was saying you have a unique knack for that. Care to collaborate on that one? Pardon the big fucking words, pal. I’m trying to impress everybody up here.
Taylor: Yeah, the best way is to have something all thought up ahead of time so you have it straight in your head. I was leaving a mall a little while and ago and a guy was having a smoke. I hollered at him, “Hey, John, haven’t seen ya at the Legion lately?” He replied, “My name’s not John. It’s Bob.” “Oh fuck, you’re not John! Shit, you look just like him” I returned. “No, and you won’t see me at the Legion either.” John-Bob added. That’s when I really kick it in to overdrive. “We’ll, the last time I saw ya, you were trying to get into a fucking racket. Anyway, good to see ya again, say hi to your Mom for me!”
JW: One of your nicknames is “Mr. 800,” Does that get a little old or do you still enjoy it?
Taylor: Well, Joe, funny you should mention that. It was 90 goals ago but I still like it. Most people who call me that probably don’t have 400 goals but they all like to feel like they’re a piece of it and let’s face it, I’m not playing hockey for personal stats now, it’s all about the fans. To answer your question, I still enjoy it, but have a feeling it’s changing next fall to Mr. 900, but let’s not count our chickens before they get stoned.”
JW: I heard the Ratz are re-loading for next year. Just exactly what is that piece of tail?
Taylor: I think the word you’re looking for is entail, but that’s okay. We tend to not re-build, we re-load. We have some feelers out right now all across Canada. Yes, I mean all across Canada. There is a huge amount of interest in playing for this squad. In fact, this might be a good time to address your situation. I don’t think we can find you a job making a six figure salary and only working Thursday and Fridays. I know that’s what you asked for, but so far, we haven’t been able to land such a position for you, sorry. As soon as I tell somebody that, they immediately ask, “Why only Thursdays and Fridays? When I tell them that you don’t want to work after game night, they usually hang up. I’m just saying.
JW: Well. I thank you for at least considering me, but I figured it would be a hard sell. Well, listen Taylor, it has been great doing this interview. I hope I get some consideration for one of them Golden Partridge Awards.
Taylor: No problem, it has been all your pleasure for sure.
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